Begging for permission starts from a lower position. It places the other person in the dominant position. The chances of success are greater when coming from a more even position.
For example, let’s imagine you want to set an appointment with someone in your network to get your foot in the door for an interview. The person whom you want to invite is not someone you know well. But, she is a senior person inside the company for which you would like to interview. If you send a long pleading message begging for 5 minutes of her time, your chances of being ignored, or pushed off to HR, are very high.
A much more effective approach would be to make a positive proposal coming from the position of assuming she would want to visit. “Hi Linda. I hope you are well. I wanted to see if you have some time this week for a phone visit. I noticed a posting for….I have time on Thursday at 3:00. Does that work for you?”
The recipient of the message is much more likely to respond and agree than if it comes from a lower position. The same holds true for communicating with others in your every day work life. Don’t beg for their acceptance. Make positive proposals.
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